


Adventures in Muggle Shopping

by vamp1987



Series: Mundane Magic [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-30 10:09:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19850956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vamp1987/pseuds/vamp1987
Summary: Fred and George discover the fascination and attraction of muggle shopping when they accompany Hermione and Tonks to Harrods.Side story from "Operation: Black Dog."





	1. A New Adventure Begins

**Disclaimer: I am making no profit from this. All rights belong to the author and publishing company.**

_AN: This is a side-story to my_ _**Operation: Black Dog** _ _. If you haven't read the other story, you might get confused in some instances (mainly why they are going shopping). This takes place right after_ _**Chapter Two: The Accident** _ _. I'm going to try to work most of the confusion out though._

_Also, just to give you fair warning, I have never been to London and never been or experienced any of the locations mentioned in the story, so if I get anything terribly wrong, let me know and I will fix it._

* * *

The four adventurers exited the magical realm of Grimmauld Place to disembark on a quest; a quest to fix Hermione's mangled hair. The orange mop was hidden underneath Ron's old homemade Chudley Cannon's stocking cap, which was fraying slightly at its worn ends. The faded orange and black striped lines of the cap offset the few fly-a-ways Hermione had.

"Why are Weasleys so drawn to orange," Hermione grumbled under her breath.

"Maybe it's the hair," Tonks whispered back with a snort.

Hermione's lips twitched as she fought the smile attempting to break free. The shopping mission was going to be slightly dodgy with supervision, Hermione thought to herself as she cut her eyes to the bubble-gum pink haired Tonks. How am I going to get everything I need without raising too many questions? How am I going to complete all my shopping without the peanut gallery, twins included? Maybe I can drop them in the...no, that won't work. I could get them to go to the...no, they would cause too much trouble there. I wonder…

Hermione's musings were cut short when the twins turned to her.

"How are we getting to this 'department store' of yours," Fred asked.

"The Knight Bus," George inquired.

"Apparating?"

"Floo powder?"

"Portkey?"

"Metro," Hermione countered.

The two purebloods cast a questioning look at Tonks at the foreign word when she squealed.

"I haven't been underground in ages," Tonks exclaimed as she bounced around only to trip over her own feet.

The twins snickered.

"I figured you two would enjoy something new," Hermione said to the twins as she helped Tonks back to her feet.

"That's great Hermione—," Fred hedged.

"—but what we were wondering was this—," George continued.

"-'underground' part," the twins questioned together.

Hermione tilted her head slightly as she regarded the two. How would she explain the subway? "Think King's Cross but underground." She paused and shrugged her shoulders, "and the train is faster and more crowded."

"So is this why you picked out our clothes," George asked.

"Yes and no," Hermione said as she looked at her three companions.

Fred and George were dressed very similarly in long sleeve shirts and jeans. The only difference was the shirts. Fred was sporting a burgundy top with a single white line wrapped completely around him that was parallel to his shoulders and a white t-shirt peeked out underneath his shirt's collar. George on the other hand was wearing an off-white shirt with a single thin black line near the top. It took three outfit changes each before Hermione was satisfied with their appearances. For some reason, the word 'inconspicuous' to the twins meant bright colors and strange fabric combinations.

Tonks had taken less time to find an adequate change of muggle clothes. Being a Metamorphmagus, Tonks could magically alter her outfit to Hermione's stipulations without too much fuss. She was wearing a waist-length, short-sleeve black top with the zipper half down over a long sleeve shirt that matched her hair and fingernails. Her black pants hugged her legs like a second skin and flared slightly over her black ankle boots. Her hair was styled in a short, spiky cut that showed off her multiple ear and eyebrow piercings.

Hermione's own outfit tried to conform to the normal teenage fashion, but only after Tonks magically altered a pink top orange to match the stocking cap. She wore an off-white jacket over the top that ended right above her faded boot-cut jeans, which partly hid her white Mary Jane's.

Refocusing her attention on answering George's question, Hermione continued, "We need to blend, yes, but also, the place we are going requires more than simple t-shirts and tennis shoes. If we are going to Harrods…"

"Wait," Tonks interrupted, "we're going to Harrods? Knightsbridge's Harrods? That Harrods?"

"Yes," Hermione replied with a smile as she took in Tonks' renewed excitement.

"What," Fred asked.

"Why are you so happy," George questioned.

"Harrods is only like one of the biggest department stores in the world. I heard it has over 330 different stores inside," Tonks gushed. "This is going to be great. I've always wanted to go but never got a chance between school and Auror training. Let's go." Tonks grabbed Hermione's arm and started off down the street.

"Uh...Tonks," Hermione began. "The Tufnell Park tube station is in the other direction."

"Right," Tonks stopped, spun around, and started walking the other way. "I knew that."

The twins shared a look and followed the two ladies. Today was definitely going to be an adventure.

* * *

_AN: Short start but more is coming soon. Oh, and according to the Harry Potter Lexicon, Grimmauld Place is located somewhere close to Tufnell Park because JK remarked in OotP that it was twenty minutes walking distance to King's Cross Station._

**Edited 17 July 2019**


	2. Down the Rabbit Hole

_Mind the Gap_

* * *

The trek to Tufnell Park tube station was short. Once they were heading in the right direction, it was only a few roads over. The distinctive red brick of the building stood in stark relief against the grey and white. The blue detailing above the entryways announced its connection to the Underground to any passing pedestrian.

Hermione stopped in front of the blue double doors in order to lay the ground rules for this little expedition.

The twins cast quizzical looks to the muggles bustling about. They took in the different varieties of clothes and styles surrounding them. They couldn't believe just how different the Muggle world seemed at times. Their father tried to extend his fascination with the other culture onto them, but it never stuck outside of the strange technology inherent in the prank paraphernalia. This adventure would be eye opening, they could tell.

Tonks ignored the stares her hair was receiving and continued to vibrate with excitement. She couldn't wait. Memories of her previous visit to the Underground with her father surfaced in her mind while visions of junk food and Muggle soda filled her senses. She could not wait for the crappy goodness. She licked her lips in anticipation.

The three refocused their attention back to Hermione when she cleared her throat.

"Okay, you three are to stay close to me at all times. I don't want you to get lost down there, but if by some chance you get left on one of the platforms we stop at, wait for the next train. I have all of the stops written down for each of you." She handed each a slip of paper with the names of each station they would be visiting, the number of stops between each destination, and the directions necessary to navigate the distance between each point to the next platform. Hermione was not taking any chances on these three. "If you are not on the next train, it will be assumed that you stayed on the platform so the remaining members will back track to find you. This might be the safest thing to do anyway since you three are unfamiliar with the Underground's network of tunnels…" She gave each of them a look, "…so no wandering off on your own."

After she saw each nod their head, she continued in her authoritarian tone, "Once we reach Harrods, I will be separating from you for a couple of hours."

"Uh Hermione, are you sure you want to do that," Tonks asked.

"What are you implying," Fred questioned as he beat Hermione to her response.

"Do you think we can't behave without her," demanded George. He was a little put out that Tonks thought they would jeopardize themselves.

"It's not that," Tonks stated with a wave of her hands. "Harrods is huge. I wasn't sure how it would work if we separated from Hermione. I mean… how are you going to find us when you're finished fixing your hair?" She directed that last part towards the girl in the orange hat.

"Good of you to ask." Hermione pulled something else out of her pocket. She handed each of them a coin. "I put a Protean Charm on these coins, so when I'm finished, it will warm up and the writing on the back will change to let you know where to meet me."

She was met with three amazed stares.

"Hermione, when did you do this?" Tonks asked in a breathless voice as she surveyed the coin. "Better question: how?"

"I finished these right before summer hols."

"Ok, why?"

"No one knew Harry got portkeyed into that graveyard until he showed back up bloody and with a dead Cedric Diggory," Hermione said with down cast eyes. "I couldn't help but think that if someone knew he had been portkeyed to another location or had something that would have linked him to someone else then that entire traumatic incident could have been avoided. Not to mention alerting the Aurors about the Death Eater meeting." Hermione paused to chew on her lower lip before continuing. "These coins and the research that went into it was a result of that. They're prototypes, but I hope to eventually add a locator spell to them. I'm also looking into portkey creation spells, but that has to wait until term starts. Now if anything happens again where Harry is in desperate need of help, I have a way for him to communicate it." She looked back up at Tonks and shrugged.

George whistled. "You are one bright bird, you know that right?"

"NEWT-level spell work created as a preventative method, nice Granger," Fred said while shaking his head. He should have known that she would do something like this for Harry. The steps she takes to keep him safe were astounding. He just hoped that the boy knew how lucky he was to have her watching his back.

Hermione cleared her throat and pulled one last thing out of her inner jacket pocket. "These are maps of Harrods. They let you know what is on each floor and where the elevator and escalators are located." She handed them each their map. "Any questions?"

"When did you…" Tonks question and suspicious gaze was cut short by Fred.

"So we get to explore on our own?" He put the question out there to test the amount of freedom Hermione was really giving them and to distract Tonks. The three of them could not afford for her to get wise to their trickery this early in the game after all.

"It would be better if the three of you stuck together before I can join you, but you can go anywhere in the building you want." With the looks the twins shared, she quickly added, "As long as you don't use any magic or cause a ruckus. Also, Tonks is in charge of you two, so if she wants you to stay together, then that is her prerogative."

The twins shrugged. They figured as much. Tonks was supposed to be keeping an eye on them anyway, but it was nice to know that Hermione trusted them enough to go off on their own if they had clearance from the chaperon.

"Hermione, when did you get all of this information together?"

Damn, Fred thought to himself, the tenacious Auror would not be waylaid.

"This morning."

"How?"

"Internet."

The unfamiliar word was met with blank stares.

"I have a computer—laptop really—that is like a handheld library." As she continued to get open stares from her companions, Hermione tried a different approach. "The only way to explain is to show you, and…" Hermione's eyes drifted inside the tube station, "I can show you inside, well sort of."

With that Hermione entered the building with two intrigued wizards and one thoroughly confused witch. A portable library? How was that even possible? Tonks shook her head.

Hermione looked to the ticket counter and found a young woman with hair as shocking as Tonks' manning the booth while reading a magazine. Figuring that the woman was too absorbed in her fascinating piece of literature, Hermione walked to the automated ticket machine in the corner. "This is a kind of computer. To get into the Underground, we need tickets. I can get them here."

"How?" George posed the question with a look of genuine curiosity. He had the same spark in his eyes that Mr. Weasley did when Hermione explained the mechanics behind the microwave. That was a long and tedious discussion, and Hermione did not wish for a repeat performance.

"It's complicated," was her answer. She ignored George's incredulous stare and continued on with her explanation. "The type of computer I use is more compact and portable. The internet is a network of free information available around the world. Imagine all the books in Hogwarts' library. Then imagine them available at the click of a button." Hermione proceeded to order and pay for their tickets as she talked. She wondered if they would really be able to grasp what she was saying without physically finding a computer and showing them.

"So, the internet is a lot of information in one place," Fred asked as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Information you can read anywhere as long as you have the whatyamacallit? Compador?"

"Essentially," Hermione said in a surprised voice, "yes."

"Figures." Fred shook his head. "Only you, 'Mione, would want a thing that would keep you in touch with books no matter where you were."

"It does more than that," Hermione grumbled under her breath as she pulled the tickets free. "It's unimportant right now anyway. I'm going to slip this ticket in here." Hermione pointed to the a little slit in the metal barrier blocking their path. "And I want you to push this." She pointed to a strange three-pronged piece of metal.

George gave it an experimental tug. "It's not moving."

"That's because I haven't put the ticket through yet," Hermione said in her normal matter-of-fact tone. "Ready?"

The three nodded for her to begin. George went through first with only moderate problems. How was he to know that the not-quite-round-metal was meant to be pushed away from him? He was followed by Fred, then Tonks, and finally Hermione.

"Tufnell only has elevators so we'll be taking them down to the platform."

Elevators were something they were all familiar with either from first-hand experience (Tonks) or second-hand knowledge (the twins). The ride was still strange though. Tonks marveled at how different this elevator was from the one in the Ministry. There was no hidden entrance in a phone booth. The doors simply opened after Hermione pushed a glowing button. There was no grille that opened but thick metal doors that reflected the florescent lights of the tunnel. The interior was odd also. The floor was carpeted in a rosy-tinted pattern of swirls. No voice alerted to the floor change, instead there was a low ding that indicated that they had reached their stop. Tonks was beginning to understand why Arthur found it all so intriguing.

"This way." Hermione led them down the tunnel at a slow pace towards the Northern Line. The Muggles however walked at brisk paces like their lives depended on reaching their destination at that precise moment. Hermione stopped as the room opened up to a small platform on either side of the tracks.

"Why 'mind the gap,'" George asked as he walked up to the yellow painted box.

"It's so you don't get sucked under the train," was Hermione's answer as she calmly awaited the arrival of said vehicle. "If everything is on schedule, we should only have to wait a few minutes. " With that she went back to watching the tracks.

The tunnel slowly filled with a couple dozen people. Some men flipped through magazines or newspapers. Fred noted that none of their pictures moved. A few children dodged between them as they played tag. A woman, presumably their caregiver, could be heard chastising them once they circled back towards her. A group of teenage girls kept sending the twins secret looks as they whispered and laughed to each other.

"Here it comes." The tell-tale screeching of grinding metal alerted all those present to the train's upcoming arrival.

The train was missing its steam engine, Fred thought with a tilted head. The carts were sleeker than those of the Hogwarts Express also. What powered this type of train? Was it that _eckeltricity_ that their father was always asking Harry about? The doors opened with a low hiss as people scrambled to get off and on at the same time.

_"Let the passengers off the train FIRST_ ," could be heard over the buzz of hurried feet and mumbled voices. _"Oh go on then, stuff yourselves in like sardines, see if I care,"_ continued the voice when no one heeded its words.

"What was that," Fred asked as they pushed their way onto the train.

"The driver," Tonks answered with a smile. She remembered this. The pushing and shoving that was met with snark and derision not only from the other passengers but from the driver as well.

_"Please note that the beeping noise coming from the doors means that the doors are about to close. It does not mean throw yourself or your bags into the doors."_ The gravel texture to the booming voice seemed to become more pronounced in annoyance. Clearly the driver had had to deal with an abundance of impatient people today.

Due to the close quarters, the prominent stench of body odor and piss permeated the atmosphere. The air was stall and thick with cigarette smoke and fragments of food. Hermione could have done without the smell and the jostling of the other passengers. It's only three stops, she thought to herself as someone elbowed her.

The ride seemed longer than the fifteen minutes it actually was, but it was worth it from the look on the twins' faces. They never expressed any interest in the Muggle world, preferring the life of magic to that of technology. But with each new experience, they discovered another fascinating thing about this different world. The experience was not life-changing or even awe-inspiring (it was just a train ride after all), but being surrounded by Muggle culture reminded the twins and even Tonks that there were more reasons to stopping Voldemort and his merry band of miscreants. They were saving their way of life while protecting this other innocent and ignorant one. These people had no idea that there was a madman out there right now planning the destruction of their world.

As the train slowed and they exited to journey to their next destination, Fred cast a heavy look to George. Their silent communication going unnoticed by their fellow travelers, but it was significant all the same. They would make sure that their war did not encroach into this world more than necessary.

George looked at Hermione who was laughing at something Tonks said and smiled. They would also make sure that stayed, the laughter. They would help keep laughter echoing through the halls of Grimmauld Place even if they had to cause some minor destruction to do it.

"Come on guys," Hermione said as she turned to look at them. "I don't want you to get lost on our way to the Victoria line."

* * *

The trip remained consistent at the next stop. The trains were spaced with enough time that they only had to wait a few minutes before boarding. The crowds remained consistent also due to the time of their journey. People leaving work for their midday meal caused them to huddle together in the center of the train as they watched the miniature tube map for their stop.

Unfortunately, the driver had to cut in with unwelcome news.

" _Well, well, well, ladies and gentlemen, it's happened again. Delays on your Victoria line and all sorts of trouble on the Jubilee."_

The news caused a number of discontented grumbles and moans from the passengers echoed throughout the cart.

Please let it be after our stop, Hermione prayed silently to any deity that would listen. I can't take much more of these close spaces, she thought as the driver continued his announcement.

" _God only knows what's going on there. It's gonna take more than Ken Livingstone to sort that out. By the way, Green Park is our next stop. Thank you."_

"Thank Merlin," she sighed. The sooner she could get out of this can the better.

"That's us right?" Tonks looked towards the map then back to Hermione.

"Yeah, this next one."

The train stopped at Green Park and the gang again got off. They hurried over to the Piccadilly line for the final stint of their journey underground.

The Piccadilly line was running slower than the other two, so it was a quarter past one when they finally neared the end of their Underground adventure.

The driver's final crack of, _"This is Knightsbridge Station. All change here for Mr. Fayed's little corner shop,"_ was the last announcement the group would be hearing from the train operators.

"We're almost there guys," Hermione declared with a smile as they lumbered up the stairs to the exit.

* * *

"That's it?"

The building that loomed ahead of them appeared to stretch out infinitely in front of them. The structure seemed to exude a certain amount of class and wealth that made the twins think that Malfoy would shop there...if he ever deemed to lower himself enough to travel to Muggle London that is. From the outside, the gang could already see several people lugging multiple cargo bags with various logos scrawled across them. Ralph Lauren, Gucci, and Burberry were some of the names that Hermione knew rested in her mother's closet at home.

"Well," Hermione turned to her companions. This was it. This was the place that had ever integral item she would need to pull her plan off. "Let's go."

The quartet walked through the glass doors and into London's largest department store.

"Welcome to Harrods," Hermione enthusiastically throw over her shoulder.

* * *

_AN: _The quotes from the subway drivers are all real.__

_I know the Protean Charm is early, but I don't think simply giving them a watch would have the same effect as the coins. This story is AU after all. Same for the internet being a little advanced for 1995._

_The ticket computers are based off of the ones I used in France. Sorry if they were different in the UK in the mid to late 1990's._

**Edited 17 July 2019**


	3. Let's Go Shopping!

* * *

" _Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping."_

—Bo Derek

* * *

The twins took in their surroundings. The people milling about had the same variety of style and dress as those from the subway, but something about the presentation screamed money. The casual wear seen on the younger population seemed too trendy to them though they were novices in the Muggle fashion world. Some seemed to be showing more skin then normally allowed in polite society while others had barely any showing at all. Some people had on hats that drew more attention than their clothing. They could see a progressiveness inherent in the various styles present that was absent in the Wizarding world. Robes while varied were still robes. The quality and cut of the fabric demonstrated the separation in class. They had never seen anything like the people before them.

Refocusing their attention back to the structure itself, they couldn't help but gape.

"Bugger me," George mumbled.

"No thanks," Fred replied distractedly.

The building was huge. From the outside it looked big but inside was a world onto itself. The six stories of shopping centers unveiled themselves to the twins when they raised their heads. The skylights overhead poured in sunlight better than the manufactured bulbs littering the walls and ceilings.

A throat clearing redirected their attention back to Hermione. She looked significantly out of place with the orange stocking cap adorning her head.

Before she was able to begin whatever she was going to say, George got a good look at Tonks. "Your hair's black."

"What?"

"Your hair is black."

"I changed it."

"When?"

"When I noticed all of the stares on the Sud-way."

"Subway," Hermione corrected.

"Yeah, that. I figured I'd blend better. I'm an Auror and we, well, need to blend."

"But when did you do it?"

"In the subway."

"This is where I break off," said Hermione as she pointed towards a glass door with _Urban Retreats_ on it and ultimately ending the conversation of George's lack of vigilance. "If you need anything, use the coins. They work by holding them in the palm of your hand and thinking about the message you want to appear. They give off a slight pulse when activated, so you'll know when there is a new message. I'll let you know when I'm finished and where we'll meet back up."

She looked at the three expectantly and received Fred and George's best rendition of an innocent face. She didn't buy it for a second. "I don't care what you do as long as you don't draw unnecessary attention to yourselves, got it?"

With three affirmative nods, Hermione straightened her shoulders and went to complete the first step of today's mission.

She entered the salon self-consciously. She knew she looked ridiculous, but the orange hair was far worse than the orange hat. Walking up to the counter, she gave the girl at the front desk her name and the stylist she was here to see.

Hermione hadn't even gotten settled before she heard, "Mon Cherie!" sound from behind her.

John Paul Mitchell, though not the famous hair stylist, prided himself in living up to the name. The tall, ebony-skinned man had been working miracles on her mother's unmanageable hair for years. Her mother refused to let anyone else touch her hair anymore and had been trying to persuade Hermione into converting to the stylish demands of John Paul ever since. Until now, she had been reluctant to get anything but a trim from the man, but today was different. Today, she finally conceded to exchange the bird's nest for something more "normal."

"I can't believe you are finally going to let me experiment," John Paul gushed. "Now, let's see what we have to work with."

Hermione reluctantly removed the stocking cap and watched in amusement as John Paul's excitement dropped into horror. Yes, she decided, it was definitely worth letting the twins' pour that potion on me for his reaction. Merlin, I wish I had a camera.

"What have you done," he exclaimed, drawing the attention of the surrounding stylists and customers.

Hermione slouched down into her chair in an attempt to get away from the gawking eyes. "Didn't Mum call you?"

"Yes, she explained what you were doing and why, but she never said that your hair was like…like… _this_!"

"You can fix it though, right?"

John Paul gave Hermione a patronizing look. "Of course I fix it. I'm John Paul Mitchell."

"Well not…"

"By the time I am finished with you, you will look like a star."

"I don't need anything fancy just a more manageable look."

"Your mother gave me the go ahead to do anything I thought was necessary and agreed to pay tomorrow when she comes in for her appointment. You will be absolutely ravishing by the time I am finished with you."

"Smashing," Hermione gritted out as John Paul left to gather his supplies. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

After breaking from Hermione, the trio decided to browse through the first set of shops. Their first stop was to the _Room of Luxury_. The room was not exactly what the twins were imagining it would be.

"Gin would love this," declared Fred as he surveyed the room.

"Mum too," added George.

"Handbags everywhere."

And they were. The walls were covered top to bottom with designer bags of various sizes. The display cases contained even more handbags as well as accessories such as wallets and other various cases with odd zippers and snaps.

"How does this look?" Fred asked as he swung an annoyingly bright yellow bag around his shoulder.

"Smashing, that bag goes great with that red top."

"Really," he asked with mock sincerity, "you don't think it clashes?"

If the elongated "No" George dragged out was not a clear enough answer, his turning to look at another counter was.

Fred glanced down at the price tag. "Is that right?"

George looked up from the display case of wallets to see the bulging eyes of his twin. His eyes reflected Fred when he too observed the price of the bag Fred had been playing with. "I don't know the exchange rate between Muggle money and galleons."

Fred slowly replaced the handbag to its shelf. "That's a lot of zeros for a bag to carry stuff in."

"Women, yeah."

"Excuse me…"

"We weren't including you, Tonks."

"Yeah, you're an exception."

"So is 'Mione."

"So we aren't women?" Tonks emphasized her question by crossing her arms.

"No—" started Fred with the shake of his head.

"—That's not what we meant," continued George.

"You don't act all girly."

"Girly?" asked Tonks with the lift of her eyebrow.

"Ya know, fussing over your appearance and all."

"'Course, you don't really have to…"

"And neither does 'Mione."

"Uh huh," said Tonks as she began to walk away.

Both of the twins sighed in relief. They did not need an offended Auror watching over them today.

* * *

"Now Cherie, do you have any ideas about the style you want," asked John Paul as he began washing Hermione's hair.

"I just need something that will be easily manageable," she replied.

John Paul sighed in exasperation. Ten years, he thought. Ten years I have tended to her mother and never has this girl picked up the fine art of hair products. With a quick twist, he rang as much water out as he could and helped Hermione out of the reclined chair. He was going to give this girl a look that was going to make heads turn and guys fall over themselves to talk to her. Jane had given him free rein so he was going to make sure to use it.

"Let's get this makeover underway."

"Makeover?" Hermione's question was left unanswered as she was swept back into the hair dresser's chair.

* * *

"This is boring," declared Fred as he looked around the room full of perfumes and other smelly products. The room was designed much like the last with displays covering the walls as well as the center counters. The attendants here though seemed more eager to help than the other room, or at least they liked to share their products. Tonks had already received a face full of something that smelled too strongly of flowers for his taste.

"Nah," replied George.

"How so," asked Fred as he turned to look at his brother expectantly. What he was not expecting was a face full of sickly sweet perfume. "Guh! You sprayed that in my mouth…"

"I didn't mean too," said George as he hurriedly replaced the bottle back on its shelf.

"What were you doing?"

"I missed."

"You missed?"

"I was aiming for your eyes."

"What?!"

"Joking."

"Right…" hedged Fred, not really sure if he believed his double.

"You smell nice by-the-way," soothed George

"I do, don't I," Fred stated pompously as he jerked on his imaginary lapels.

"Certainly," said a straight-faced George.

At the counter three down from the twins, the attendant asked, "Are they with you?"

Tonks looked up from the display and towards the rambunctious redheads. "Never seen them before in my life," she denied.

"Didn't they come in with…"

"No," interrupted Tonks

"Hey!"

Tonks looked towards the twins in time to see George trying to shake off the smell Fred sprayed him with.

"Now you smell nice too," said Fred with a satisfied grin.

"I smell like Aunt Muriel."

"Revenge is mine."

"Do you have anything subtle yet alluring? Something that attracts attention perhaps but doesn't overpower say a very sensitive nose?" asked Tonks as she ignored the twins' shenanigans in favor of purchasing something to tempt a certain werewolf.

* * *

"What are you doing," questioned Hermione as she warily watched John Paul mix chemicals.

"I am going to straighten your hair."

"What about the chemicals that you've already put on it?"

"I know what I'm doing, Cherie. Just sit back and let the master work."

Hermione continued to watch John Paul with trepidation. She hoped that the potion the twins mixed in with their prank would prevent Muggle chemicals from frying her hair.

* * *

"There is tea everywhere," declared George as they entered the tea and coffee branch of the _Food Hall_.

"Do they not have smaller displays of anything?" asked Fred.

"Guess not."

"Look at the candies." George pointed towards the center display of chocolates and other sweets traditionally served with tea.

"It almost gives Honeyduke's a run for its money."

"Yeah, all it needs is a wall of this stuff—"

"—And screaming hyperactive kids."

"Well, according to the map Hermione gave us, this place actually has a candy shop," said George as he flipped through the brochure.

"You interested?"

Before George could answer, Tonks displayed her usual grace by tripping.

"These look great…umph." The casualty was a display of various herbal teas occupying one of the center shelves.

"Tonks!"

"Sorry, sorry, I slipped." Tonks blushed as she looked at the mess she caused and then towards the attendants attempting to reestablish their orderly shelves. "Let me help," she asked but was rebuffed. It was always better to leave the scene after an embarrassment anyway. Tonks grabbed hold of an arm from both redheads and scrambled to exit without further incident.

* * *

"Woah," panicked Hermione as she saw how much length John Paul wanted to remove.

"Trust me," he said as he hedged the scissors closer.

"That is shorter than I have ever had it."

"You'll be glad once the weight is off of your head," was all he said as he cut the strand. There was no backing out now.

"I hope you're right," said Hermione in a resigned tone. She could always make a Regrowth Potion when term starts if it looks bad. With eyes closed, Hermione allowed John Paul to do his worst.

* * *

"What is this?"

"Some kind of moving staircase?"

"I don't know," replied Tonks as she too looked questioning at the piece of Muggle technology before her.

"The people are gliding somewhat," stated Fred.

"It looks safe enough," said George as he tried to catch one of the moving stairs. Finally succeeding, he grabbed onto the railing to keep from falling backwards. "See," he said as he turned to look at his companions. "There's nothing to it."

Fred took Tonks' arm after watching George almost fall, and together, they carefully stepped onto the step forming under their feet.

"That was fun," declared George once he hopped off at the top.

"Yeah, let's go again," said Fred. Before he could make it to the down escalator, Tonks reclaimed his arm.

"How about we continue our exploration? We want to see more than just two rooms before Hermione's finished, right?"

"You're right," pouted Fred.

"Let's see what else we can find," said George as he led the way towards their next destination.

* * *

Hermione took in her new appearance and could hardly believe her eyes. "I look nothing like me," she said in amazement. "How did you get my hair to stay straight?"

"I told you, Cherie," started John Paul with a satisfied smile, "I am a master at my craft. Now," he clapped his hands together, "Let's get started on the second phase of this plan of yours, yes?"

With one last look in the mirror, Hermione gave a decisive nod. Yes, on to Phase Two.

* * *

The display in front of them caught all three adventurers off guard. Tonks frowned at the necessity of it while George pondered its effectiveness. Fred simply sulked.

"If I had known there was a cobra here*," he pouted, "I would have gotten Harry to come with."

The clear display case before them contained two things: a pair of jewel-encrusted red high-heel shoes and a live Egyptian cobra.

Rolling his eyes, George nudged his brother in the side. "Why did we come?"

"For 'Mione," was Fred's deadpan reply.

"Not to what?"

"Make trouble."

"And that includes?"

"Playing with snakes," pouted Fred again.

"Correct," said George with a smile. "Now, what I want to know is if you can really charm one."

"One what?"

"One cobra."

Fred took in George's devilish grin and then echoed it. "Why not find out?"

"Why not indeed."

* * *

"I didn't plan on this," said Hermione as she took in the extravagance of _The White Hall_. The assorted bouquets of yellow and pale pink flowers contrasted nicely against the crisp white walls of the room. Each station housed different types of make-up for various skin tones.

"I think with a new hair style you need a new look to accompany it," said John Paul.

"Don't you have to go back to the boutique?"

"I'm on break," he said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Now, you sit down here and let Jessica fix you up."

Knowing she had been outmaneuvered again, Hermione decided to momentarily postpone Phase Two of her plan and continue her role as Barbie doll for the day.

* * *

"Look at all this Christmas stuff," Fred said with wonder lighting his voice.

"But it's August," George declared with confusion.

"Everything you could need is here." It was a true declaration. Like all of the other rooms they had visited, this one was completely covered with the items of choice, and in this instance, that was Christmas.

"It's summer," continued George.

"None of this stuff moves like ours though," said Fred as he ignored his twin's growing exasperation.

"Christmas is still four months away."

"This is boring," declared Fred as he picked up an ordinary box of tree lights. "Look at it. Where are the enchantments?"

"Is this always here?" George couldn't help but wonder aloud.

"The music's different too," pointed out Fred.

"Do they actually make sells year 'round?"

"Maybe we should buy some stuff."

The question knocked George out of his ruminations about the bazaar fascination Muggles seemed to have for this particular holiday if they bought items year around. "What? Why?"

"It's a _Christmas_ story…"

"It's _August_ …"

"We can get a head start on our holiday stock," said Fred with an encouraging smile. "Every consumer store has to have a holiday stock."

"True," George admitted.

"And this stuff without magic inherent in its creation will give us more room to experiment."

Intrigued, George asked, "What are you thinking?"

"Mistletoe to start."

Catching onto the idea, George said, "That forces people to remain underneath until they've kissed."

"Yeah," agreed Fred, "and maybe some ornaments…"

"That move around the tree?"

"Maybe," said Fred. "Let's pick out a few basic things to tamper with and see what happens."

"We might even be able to convince Hermione to help with some of the Charms…"

* * *

"Can we go pick up the other items I need now?"

John Paul looked up from the display case of Clinique products he was perusing to the transformed youth tapping her foot impatiently beside him. "Don't you want…"

"No," Hermione interrupted. "I want to get the clothes and other supplies I ordered ahead of time." Relaxing her stance, Hermione begged, "Please. I didn't expect this to take so long. I have people waiting for me."

Deciding to show her a bit of mercy, John Paul wordlessly headed towards the exit.

"Thank you," Hermione beamed as she told John Paul exactly where she needed to go next.

* * *

"Look, they have beds here." The twins took in the various bed spreads adorning different beds around them.

"Fancy a lie down?"

Fred shrugged, "Why not?"

"After you, Gred," said George with a slight bow.

"Thank you, Forge."

"Boys," began Tonks.

"Come on, Tonks," said George. "Just for a moment?"

"Please," begged Fred.

"Fine," she huffed. "You better not get us in trouble with another security guard. I might not rescue you a second time."

Looking up from his prone position on a black and white bed set, Fred asked, "What did you say to that guard anyway?"

Tonks just gave him a wicked smirk and laid down on a neighboring paisley printed bed spread with blue tones.

* * *

"I think that's it," sighed Hermione as she grabbed the last of her bags from the counter.

"Do you need a hand," asked John Paul.

"No," she said. "I have friends to help me with these." She sat her purchases at her feet and gave John Paul a tight hug. "Thank you so much for today. I know I was difficult and seemed unappreciative at times, but I really do love my new look. Thank you for taking the time to help me."

Giving Hermione another squeeze, John Paul said, "Not a problem, Cherie. I have been wanting to change your hair for quite some time anyway; you just gave me the perfect opportunity." Separating from the young girl, he added, "Now if you follow the steps I told you, everything should work out great."

With a last kiss to her cheek, John Paul headed back to work while Hermione pulled out a coin from her pocket.

* * *

"Something is vibrating in my pants."

"That's 'Mione"

"No, I don't think so."

"Don't be crass."

"I would never…"

"Yeah, yeah."

* * *

Meeting up with Hermione was a bit trickier than they previously expected. Not only was she back on the ground level, neither the twins nor Tonks remembered the exact route they took to get to the third floor to start with. After several attempts and a few backtracking efforts, the trio conceded that they were lost and just decided to let Hermione know where they were so she could come to them.

"Did you have fun," was the first thing Hermione asked as she came across her companions in the café they decided to wait at.

The three shared a look. "It was an adventure," said Tonks.

"But we need to get crankin'—"

"—And pop on back to the Burrow—"

"—Before Mum has a fit."

Agreeing with their assessment, Hermione turned on her heels and lead the group back toward the main entrance while she listened to their take on the Muggle shopping center and all the things they found interesting.

Once they were outside in a secluded area, a loud crack was all that remained of the Wizarding individuals as they left London behind.

* * *

*The Egyptian cobra was acquired for the September 10, 2007 release of the Rene Caovilla shoes (which were £62,000 or $120,000), but I thought it would be funny, so...I added it in anyway.

_This officially ends the_ **Operation** _saga. I want to thank all of you for joining me on this journey._

_Thank you for reading!_

**Edited 17 July 2019**


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